Overcoming Weary Mommy Syndrome

For many years I have struggled under my own expectations, or a list of what I “thought” I was to do to flourish as a wife, mother and homemaker in a way that would bring glory to God. This list of expectations included lots of ideals that on the outside seemed good, but had slowly become a heavy yoke for me as I tried to carry it.

This list includes being a perfectly submissive wife who loves and  honors her husband, have loving and obedient children,  keep a spotless home that is clutter free and well decorated, home schooling my children with the best curriculum, finding the best deals on our family needs, baking my own bread, juicing my own juice, feeding my family the most healthful foods, growing my own garden, canning my own food and the list goes on and on. While none of these are “bad” in and of themselves, the expectation of myself that I can do all these things and do them consistently and perfectly was causing me to feel weary and overwhelmed. I have never lived up to the expectation I had of myself of a perfect wife, mother, homemaker and woman of God. Rather, I often felt loaded down and was tired, stressed, discontent, and unpleasant. In fact, I was more often accomplishing the opposite of what I felt was noble and good, and reaping a harvest that was not fruitful for myself, my family, or those around me.

Many times I would start my day out asking the Lord to equip me and show me how to do it all. Many times I thought He didn’t hear me, because I would go through my days with my goals and to do list and I would end it with much of it being left unchecked.  I was tired of being tired, and began to really cry out to God for help. It was during this time that He began to speak to my heart and reveal such wonderful and freeing truths to me.

Taking Every Thought Captive

The first area that God brought to my heart was that I was not taking every thought captive to Him; rather I was impulsively going about things that I thought were honorable. These good things were slowly crowding out and taking over the best things. The good things were causing me to try reach for a standard and create a lifestyle that I thought was noble, virtuous and holy. Notice the “I” in these statements!  I was trying to do the things that I thought were good and forgetting to ask Him what He wanted me to be and do.

Many of these things that I thought of to do stemmed from comparing my life with others. This is such an easy trap to fall into.  We see Sally grinding her own grain and baking her own bread, and we feel we don’t measure up unless we do it too. We see Jane decorating her home beautifully, and we look around at our home and see all the things we want to change. We then begin to create a standard based on others lives instead of God’s will for us. We then add these things to our list and begin to carry a much larger load then God intended. By taking our thoughts captive, we will bring all things before him and seek His guidance in our lives. Jesus did nothing apart from His Father, and we should learn from that example. He cares about all things, big and small!  It is great to be inspired and motivated by others, but to feel condemned and inferior is a trick of the enemy used to tear us down and defeat us. I continue to struggle in this area, but have tried to make a more concerted effort to simply say “Lord, this is what I want to do. Would you have me do this?”  Then I must make the effort to be still and not do anything until I hear from Him. That is the hardest part sometimes!

Seeking His Kingdom First

When Jesus tells to seek first His kingdom, He is warning us not to place value on things to the extent that we seek those things first and not Him, or that we concern ourselves so much with the basics that we overlook the important. I learned that I was often running ahead of the Lord, starting where He meant for me to end. I was placing value on things that He would take care of once I put my priorities in order. Instead of patiently seeking Him and waiting for Him to add where He saw fit, I began laboring and building a kingdom on my own. By seeking first His kingdom and focusing on the things that He guides me to do, it will create an overflow in my life that will result in achieving many of the honorable and noble things I was striving for. By stopping and asking “Will this matter in eternity?” I have been able to gain so much perspective in my life on what I should do instead of what I could do.

Truly Seeking His Glory

This is a difficult one! As much as my mouth would say I was seeking His glory, He showed me that I was doing many things for my own glory. I would say it was for Him, but if I was to be truthful with myself, much of my expectations were in pleasing others and gaining their approval instead of God’s. This was quite humbling to me. Why did I want a spotless and well decorated home? Why did I want obedient and loving children? Was it really for God’s glory? When I took a long hard look at my list of expectations, I had to admit that most of them were for myself and not for Him. I have since learned to allow God to search my heart daily: Is this for me, or for Him? When I get off track in an area, I can quickly repent and ask Him to create in me a clean heart and renew a right spirit within me.

Simple, But Powerful

These things may sound rather simple, but for me they have been powerful truths. If I am living my day going about my own duties, concerned with list of things to accomplish, and seeking my own glory,  I will eventually have a load that I cannot carry. I try to stop and ask myself “Am I building a life based on what I think I should be doing, or am I truly living a life that He has called me to live?  Is the list I have assigned myself one that will bring glory to me or to Him? If you are burdened, weary or frustrated it may be that you are walking in your own strength and leaving God out of your best laid plans.

As I have journeyed through these truths, I am amazed at how free and content I feel. I am now purposing each day to take my thoughts captive to Him, seek first His kingdom, walking in His strength and not my own, and seeking the things that will truly give Him the glory He deserves. I pray that I build a life and home upon Him and not on my own meager efforts. My hearts desire is that I become so in tune to His calling on my life that I can be all He has called me to be. I know that as I walk out these things He will equip me each and everyday with meaningful, kingdom minded tasks that ultimately bring Him the glory He deserves. That is a to do list I am more than happy to complete!

Q & A: Structuring the Day for a Toddler

Q: Melissa, Thanks so much for your reply. I haven’t tried a more structured routine because I fear I cannot keep being consistent with it. He does spend a lot of time alone during the day as I tend my 1 yr old(nursing, changing, (etc.) I have never considered him being alone causing his independence, but I can see where it would. I do not feel an adequate mother because at times I do raise my voice(yell) and get irritated when I am interrupted. I feel pulled in a million directions and often resent the time I have to spend with all the responsibilities I have.  Any advice on a good routine for a 3 1/2 yr old, with a still nursing on occasion 1 yr old? Thanks!!!

A: Dear Mom, Toddlers can be very trying or very rewarding. I remember when my son who is just about to turn 19 was  3 1/2 years old and I had a newborn baby girl. At the time I was very young and despite my best efforts I just didn’t know how to handle him. I have learned a lot since then! It’s too bad that sometimes our firstborn children don’t get the best of us.

A lot of things can affect the behavior of your toddler. A calm child is more likely to come from a calm home and vice versa. Keep in mind here, that there are exceptions to the rule! But generally this is the case.

Your three year old knows that when you sit down to nurse the baby that you are distracted. He also knows when you are distracted with other tasks whether it is changing a diaper, cooking a meal, cleaning the house, or reading a book. Three year olds naturally want to take advantage of the situation! Not only that, but three year olds want your attention, so if he is occupying himself for large portions of the day he is going to be harder to handle.

I know how easy it is to want to “escape” from reality by sitting down with a book, computer, television, etc. – ignoring the little tyke as he pulls all of the books off the shelf or gets into the refrigerator. You just want peace and quiet!

I also know how easy it is to feel like a three year old is a needy little monster who is sucking the life out of you. So, when you are trying to get your TO DO LIST accomplished, interruptions are not pleasant. You just want to get your stuff done and get on with your life!

Let me tell you though – I have been there and now that my 18 going on 19 year old is practically grown, I really wish I had taken more time to sit on the floor with him and listened to him talk to me, play with me, interact with me. In other words I wish I had spent more time being “present.” I was there, but my mind was elsewhere.

Thankfully, by the time he was school age I had a wake up call because I realized how fast my children were growing up and I have spent the last dozen years or more “being present.”

Jesus has given us the honor of being a mom. Our first and foremost ministry is not to our friends, it’s not to our church, it’s not to ourselves – it is to our family – our husbands and children. This time passes by soooo quickly! I know it seems like forever when all you feel is frustration and sorrow. But this will pass and you will wonder where the years went!!

It’s okay to take a time out from time to time and read a book or soak in the tub. And it is okay to insist that the house be kept neat and tidy. It  is even good for your kids to know that responsibilities are important. But don’t forget that being there for your kids, paying attention to what they are doing – even when you’d rather be somewhere else – is in the end going to make everyone happier. Including yourself.

I often hear (and witness) moms who complain about their toddlers creating havoc in the home everyday. The child makes huge messes, throws temper tantrums, insists on having his way all the time. But my question is always this – what is Mom doing when little Timmy is making that huge mess?

If you are in the kitchen cooking supper and little Timmy is in the living room pulling all of the tape out of the VCR tapes – the problem does not lie with the child, it lies with the mom. She has allowed her little mischievous child to be alone for 30 minutes while she prepares the meal (which is a worthy endeavor). Rather than allowing him unsupervised access to the living room (or any other part of the house) put up a gate and insist he stay in the kitchen with you while you cook. Then, give him activities to keep him busy.For instance:

• give him a drawer of pots or toy dishes he can play with
• feed him grapes or carrot stick while he waits for supper
• pull out a special coloring book reserved just for that same time each day
• let him tear up lettuce for the salad, stir the cornbread batter, or shake the “Shake and Bake”

If your toddler helps himself to the fridge every time you sit down to nurse the baby (or whatever), instead of letting him have free reign of the house, put up a gate and give him a box of blocks or other toy to play with. One of my favorite ideas is to make Activity Bags for your toddler. Get them out only when you nurse the baby or at the same time each day when you need to get a chore done.

So, my point is, toddlers are going to get into stuff, if for no other reason than to test your parenting skills! Don’t leave them unattended! The other issue with leaving your child alone to occupy himself is the fact that is causes your child to feel insecure and unsure of himself. He realizes that the boundaries are too wide and what he really wants is structure and solid boundaries to keep him safe. Having reasonable rules and limits to what is acceptable behavior gives children a feeling of being loved and cared for.

Oh, and another note – a lot of moms don’t wake up before their children. Instead, little Timmy has to come and wake mommy up and ask for something to eat. Don’t be that kind of mom.

Here is a good routine for a mom with a toddler and infant:

6:00 am – Wake up. Have devotions and prayer time – if baby is away, nurse her during this time. Prepare Breakfast.

7:00 am – Wake up toddler. Make beds. Get dressed. Eat Breakfast. Morning Worship – sing some fun songs, have a Bible story, and pray.

8:00 am – Chore Time for Mom – Tidy kitchen & sweep, tidy bathrooms & wipe down sinks, start load of laundry,10 minute de-clutter. During this time you can do one of two things with the little ones – put the gate up and let them play with toys. Or let them watch PBS. I know television as a baby sitter [sigh]. It works.

9:00 am -  Play time.

10:30 am – Snack time.

11:30 am – Pick up toys. Prepare lunch.

12:00 pm – Eat lunch. Tidy Kitchen.

1:00 pm – Playtime with Mommy.

2:00 pm - Nap/ Quiet time. Afternoon chores for Mommy – fold & put away clothes, mop floors, tidy house, etc.

4:00 pm – Play Outside time in good weather. Or Play Inside during bad weather, in which case at 4:45 have children pick up toys. Don’t just tell your toddler to clean up his toys. Work beside him. Also, having toys well organized makes this much easier. Teach your child from an early age to only get one toy out at a time. HUGE timesaver!

5:00 pm – Prepare supper.

6:00 pm – Eat supper.

7:00 pm – Family Worship.

7:30 pm – Bath time. Story time.

8:00 pm – Bed time for kids. Let me say that bedtimes can be really difficult. I still remember the frustration of putting my first three children to bed – the crying, the spankings – it was horrible. I wised up with my fourth and fifth kids. I laid down and snuggled with them. Those memories are precious to me – the conversations we had! The hugs and kisses! The sweet, happy bedtimes! I wouldn’t trade it for the world!

9:00 pm – Tidy kitchen. Prepare for tomorrow.

Once you do a routine everyday, your child will begin to know what to expect and when. Eating at about the same time is really helpful and can prevent a lot of temper tantrums caused by low blood sugar (hunger)! Patience in dealing with your children is really key – a calm mommy is more likely to have a calm baby/ child. If you always respond with a tense/ angry voice why should you expect any different from your child?

Don’t not try to get into a good solid routine just because you afraid of failing. Never forget that tomorrow is a new day! God can give you the strength to be the best mom possible for your children. It isn’t easy. Raising kids just isn’t. But it is worth every bit of effort!

Snow White

Stepping out into glowing sky and walking through the new fallen snow, my son Jack‘s eyes filled with wonder. In an unprecedented event, over twelve inches of snow now covered our small community in North Texas. Unspoiled and pristine, the small drifts seemed to light up the sky as darkness loosened its grasp on our surroundings. Being a native Texan, Jack was amazed by this novelty, for this was a sight he had never before seen in his 12 years.

Snowflakes were still falling gently on our heads as we walked down our meandering street. With the smoky smell of burning wood from nearby homes filling the air, we trudged on under the stillness of the evening sky while the snow crunched under our feet and branches hung heavy with snow. And while we walked together through this winter wonderland, Jack began to share pieces of his day.

After a short while, he began to speak from his heart. He explained his struggle with a boy at his school with whom he has consistently quarreled this past year. Frustrated by yet another confrontation, Jack painfully confessed, “Mom, no matter what I do, I always get a funny feeling in my stomach whenever I am around him. I feel angry when I see him and I just don’t know how to forgive him for all the rotten things he has done to me.” Bitterness was taking root in my young son’s innocent spirit and unforgiveness had a stronghold on his heart. Sympathetically, I took in his words and validated his feelings, withholding judgment so my son would continue to share freely.

In the crisp winter air, I shivered and began to pray silently for wisdom while we quietly walked in the winter glow. As we trudged through the snow covered sidewalk, it occurred to me that God was ministering to Jack with the snow. Gently, I directed his attention to the beauty and purity all around us. And as we strolled in the wonderland in our midst, I reminded Jack that forgiveness was modeled and won at Calvary. Let us not forget that Jesus was beaten. Humiliated. Betrayed. Condemned to death on a cross. Certainly, our Savior had every right to look upon his accusers with contempt. But Jesus, being fully man and fully God, conquered sin and chose forgiveness. Remaining on the cross by choice, Jesus began to plead, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.” Luke 23:34. (NIV)

Inheriting the sinful condition of man, we too should be met with God’s judgment. Still, Jesus came to take our punishment and offer mercy in its place, for “everyone who believes in him receives forgiveness of sins through his name.” Acts 10:43. (NIV) In a word, we are forgiven. But there is more. For it is written, “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.” Ephesians 4:32. (NIV) As children of God, fully reconciled by Christ, we are called to freely forgive.

At times, forgiveness can seem like impossibility. Truly, we all have wounds that deeply pierce our hearts. Memories of the hurts of yesterday can cause bitterness to swell within us. Filled with indignation, we often cannot offer the forgiveness our LORD desires. Our “need” to even the score and avenge our pain causes forgiveness to bitterly elude us. In our own strength, we cannot find the will to forgive.

And yet, we have a sympathetic Savior who completely understands our human condition and continuously intercedes on our behalf. And as we come to the end of ourselves, we must choose to humbly forgive our transgressors, trusting God to deal with our circumstances. When we rely on His power, we are enabled to confront pain and lay our unforgiveness at Jesus’ feet, joyfully proclaiming, “Cleanse me with hyssop, and I will be clean; wash me, and I will be whiter than snow.” Psalm 57:17. (NIV) Like the quiet of a snow-filled evening, our spirit is renewed and we find peace in forgiveness. Let us model Christ and allow Him to make us white as snow.

Rainy Day Fun

This year, it seems as if there has been more rain than ever. Some of you have seen a lot of snow and have been snowed in your homes with the kiddos. If you’ve been snowed in or just stuck inside on a rainy day, here are a couple of fun and edible ways to brighten up your day!

First, on our agenda is a recipe for Play Dough Cookies. I have tried this recipe, and had a ton of fun making them! A friend and I decided to make them during Christmas, although neither of us have children. My nephew thought the cookies “looked cool”, like a large lollipop. I’m sure that children of any age would enjoy this! They are fun, bright and very delicious! We found this recipe on The Secret is in the Sauce blog.

Play Dough Cookies

3/4 cup butter
3 ounces cream cheese
1 cup white sugar
1 egg
1 tsp. vanilla extract
2 and 3/4 cup flour
1 tsp. baking powder
1/4 tsp. salt
assorted food coloring (gel or paste works best)
*We used gel food coloring, and it was an absolute success!*

1. In a bowl cream butter, cream cheese and sugar until fluffy. Add egg and vanilla. Beat until smooth.

2. In a bowl combine flour, baking powder, and salt. Add dry ingredients to the creamed mixture. Stir until soft dough forms. Divide dough into Fourths. Tint each with a different food coloring.

Wrap in plastic and chill for two hours. (I stuck it in the freezer for 15 minutes because I hate to wait!)

3. Preheat oven to 350. Shape colors into 3/4 inch balls.

For each cookie place one pink, one orange, one green, and one blue ball together and roll to make one giant ball. Roll into a 12 inch long snake, and then starting at one end coil roll to make a cookie.Place cookies 2 to 3 inches apart on greased cookie sheet to allow for spreading.

4. Bake for 8 minutes or until lightly browned. Cool and store in an airtight container. Enjoy!

We found that by placing the rolled balls back in the freezer for about 15 to 20 minutes, they were easier to roll out into snakes for some adorable cookies! Here, they are – the finished product!

Next, we are going to make homemade Play-Doh! Since it is homemade, it is also edible. I know that, as a child, my brother and I often considered eating the store bought kind. So mothers, never fear! Your child is safe to eat your “Play Dough”.

Play Dough for Kids

Ingredients:

1 cup flour
2 tsp. cream of tartar
1 tbsp. oil
1/2 cup salt
1 cup water
Food coloring/flavoring (optional)

Directions:

Mix all ingredients. Cook over medium heat for 1 minute or until mixture begins to get thick. Pour onto wax paper and knead. Put into a zipper bag to keep fresh and soft.

To color:

Put amount of dough you wish to color in a zipper bag. Drop food coloring into bag with dough and knead while in bag.

I hope you have a fantastic time making the “Play Dough” and Play Dough cookies! The cookies are absolutely delicious, and definitely picture worthy! I have had a great time making each of these recipes. It might be said that I, too am just a big kid.

So, if you ever find yourself (and your children) stuck inside on a cold, nasty day grab up these recipes and prepare to brighten your day!

Tim Tebow Super Bowl Commercial

Did you see the ad? I thought it was well done and not nearly as controverial as so many “women’s groups” had claimed. I am so glad that Focus on the Family ran the ad and encouraged people to get the whole Tim Tebow story on their website.

Tips for Teaching Your Children to be More Thankful

As the mother of five children, I have realized that children are not always as thankful as they should be. In fact, children can be downright greedy at times and you may wonder how it was possible that you gave birth to such a selfish creature.

So, how do we, as moms, teach our children that life is not always easy and they should be thankful for all that they have and that they should appreciate what others have done for them or given them? Here are some easy ways you can incorporate being thankful in your everyday life.

1. Model Thankful Behavior. This may seem like an obvious one, but how often do you remember to say thank you when someone does something for you? How often do you tell your children how thankful you are that have a warm home, or a full fridge, or even a friendly pet? We should be thankful for all things in this life. Tonight as you sit together at the dinner table begin a new conversation with the words, “I am so thankful for …” even if all you can think to be thankful for is the fact that your family is together. And remember to be thankful all year round – not just during the holiday season!

2. Let Your Children Contribute. Kids like to feel they are contributing something worthwhile to others. Whether it be helping you set the table, or baking cookies for a neighbor, or raking leaves for an elderly person, children will be more thankful if they feel they are helpful to others. A good lesson can be learned from volunteering time at a local soup kitchen or other charity. It never hurts for children to realize there are others who are less fortunate than they are.

3. Don’t Bombard Children with Too Much Stuff. Kids are like sponges. They will grab up as much stuff as they can. Has your child ever had a case of the GIMMES? Once they get it, it can be a hard task to change their selfish attitude to one of thankfulness. One word: PURGE! Give excess to the needy.

4. Keep a Family Blessings Journal. Record happy events, fun memories and other notes on Friday evening after supper. From time to time reread the entries.

Home is the Heart of All Activity

Society is composed of families, and is what the heads of families make it. Out of the heart are “the issues of life”; and the heart of the community, of the church, and of the church, the prosperity of the nation, depend upon home influences.

The elevation or deterioration of the future of society will be determined bu the manners and morals of theyouth growing up around us. As the youth are educated, and as their characters are molded in the childhood to virtuous habits, self-control, and temperance, so will their influence be upon society. If they are left unenlightened and uncontrolled, and as the reult bcome self-willed, intemperate in appetite and passion, so will be their future influence in molding society. The company which the young now keep, the habits they now form, and the principles they now adopt are the index to the state of society for years to come.

– Ministry of Healing, Ellen White, p. 349

Fingerpaint Recipes

Jell-O Fingerpaint

Ingredients:
Flavored Jell-o or other brand of gelatin
Boiling Water

Instructions:
With an adult’s help, empty packet of gelatin into a small bowl. Add just enough water to make gelatin the consistency of fingerpaint. Tastes good too!

Kool-Aide Finger Paint

Ingredients:
2 cups flour
2 packs of unsweetened Kool-Aid
1/2 cup salt
3 cups boiling water
3 tablespoons oil

Instructions:
With and adult’s help, mix all ingredients together.

Sidewalk Paint

Ingredients:
1/4 cup cornstarch
1/4 cup water
6 – 8 drops food coloring (or to desired shade)

Instructions:
Mix ingredients together. Repeat to make different colors. Washes off easily.

10 Alternatives to Halloween

In our family we decided not to celebrate a holiday that celebrates pagan and satanic themes. We want to uplift our creator in everything we do – every day of the year. There are lots of ways to not celebrate Halloween, but still have a fun time together as a family. My children have no problem with missing out on things that are evil in order to take a stand for Jesus. This year we are going to our church’s Fall Festival. It will be lots of fun!

I personally believe our children should be taught that sometimes we don’t do certain things simply because they do not please God. It is a fact of life that there will be times when everyone around us is doing “something fun” that does not honor God. This is especially true once our children become teens. Sex, drugs, and alcohol can seem like a lot of “fun” and peer pressure will weigh down those who have not been taught how to “Just say no for Jesus.”

Once you have explained to your children why you will no longer be celebrating Halloween, or even if you have never celebrated the day, here are some ideas to make the Halloween night a night to banish evil and make Jesus the center “light.”

1. Go door to door passing out “treats” rather than receiving them! Explain that Jesus is the real treat and give them a tract to read, such as the ones at The American Tract Society.

2. Tape candy pieces to religious bookmarks or child friendly tracts and pass them out as the trick or treaters come to your door.

3. Attend a fall festival at a local church.

4. Invite friends over for a Bible Character costume party.

5. Stay home with your family and play board games all night. Talk to each other!

6. Go door to door collecting cans for the hungry for Thanksgiving and make baskets to give to local needy families at Thanksgiving. Get the church involved and increase your food bank supply!

7. Have a family communion.

8. Have a fall themed potluck dinner with other families. only serve foods such as apples, winter squash and soups.

9. Have a Family Day. Choose your families favorite activities: go to the park, visit a Christian bookstore, go out to eat… just make it special!

10. Have a group hayride. Sing song praising God. Some local farms may do this for a small fee.

Whatever you do, do for the glory of God!

Go Clean Your Room!

by Melissa Ringstaff
If you are a mom, you have said it a million times, “Go clean your room!” It is a rare mother who gives birth to a child who prefers to clean his room instead of trash it.So what are moms and dads to do if they want their children to put away the toys, place clothes in the hamper, and keep books perfectly lined on their shelves?

Well, this may seem harsh to some of you. First things first. Go clean your room – and the bathroom, and the kitchen, and the family room, and the home office, and the garage, and the closets… you get the idea. If your room has piles of clean clothes waiting to be folded, or you only make your bed when company comes over, or the dishes get washed only when there is nothing left in the house to eat with you are not demonstrating an organized life to your child.

Okay, so maybe your house is not a candidate for the popular show on Lifetime Television, How Clean is Your House?, but look around.

• Does your desk have stacks of un-filed papers?
• Do you forget to fold the clothes as soon as the dryer stops?
• Does your bed turn stale before the sheets are changed?
• Do your feet stick to the floor before you remember to mop?Perhaps your careless ways have rubbed onto your children. It is time to clean up. Today.

Your next course of action is to create a friendly routine that you and your children can comfortably work around. Make a list of chores that need to be completed each week. Then divide them up appropriately among the members of your family. Children should be expected to do chores daily. And if Dad works outside the home full time to support his family, his household chores should reflect his hard work each week. In other words, don’t expect Dad to clean the house after a long day at work. Stay at home moms, should take over most of the responsibility for maintaining the household. The Bible tells us we are to be “keepers at home.” So, make your home a real priority. If both mom and dad work outside the home, you will have to have a discussion about who should be responsible for each chore and when. Then be accountable for your part.

Making a routine a habit is the hardest part for some people. Especially if they are not used to being on a schedule or have always been unorganized. Don’t give up if you fall off the schedule. Tomorrow is a new day with a fresh set of goals. Post the chores and schedules up where everyone can see them on a daily basis. The kitchen works well for my family.

Pray each morning before you begin your day. Ask God to give you the will power to make your home pleasing to HIM so that your family can live daily in comfort. Finally, work with your children to show them how to clean up. For instance, in the evening after supper, clear the table immediately with their help. Then after Family Worship time, follow them to their bedrooms and sit down. Tell them nicely what to do.

“John, put your books on the shelf – no like this.”
“Sarah, place your dirty clothes in the laundry hamper.”
“Timmy, you know your room looks nicer if you don’t leave your cars on the floor. Put them in the right bucket.”

And then be sure to do the same when you go to your own room to retire for the day.

Daily Plan of Action: (This is what I use in my own home.)

• Daily Prayer and Devotion
• Make Beds
• Wipe Down Bathroom Sinks
• Wash Two Loads of Laundry
• Clean Kitchen and Sweep
• Straighten House
• 10 – 20 Minute De-clutter of One Area
• One to Two Weekly Chores

Lastly, organize your child’s things so that when he is finished with a project or toy, he can put them away easily. Remember the adage, A place for everything and everything in its place. Group like toys, ie. Legos, Lincoln Logs, dolls, etc., into plastic storage containers and label them. Label everything. Teach your child this rule: “Only One toy at a time.” Your child must return the toy to its proper place before getting out a new toy.

Keeping a neat house, especially when you have children running around, is not easy. In fact, much of the time, it is down right hard. But tackle it like any other project. Break it down into manageable sections. Make a Plan of Action or Daily Schedule. And stick to it – every day. If I don’t stick to my plan daily, my house can go from clean to disaster within a matter of hours.

If your child destroys his room, it can take hours to clean. BUT, if he puts away his things as soon as he is finished with them, it only takes a few seconds at a time. The same goes for grown ups. A messy bedroom takes longer to clean than a relatively neat one and three papers are easier to file that a mountain of papers. Learn your lesson… and then pass it on!

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